Chapter 124
Karsian’s Past
The embrace, which seemed like it would last forever, ended more quickly than expected. The news that Eleanor had woken up caused the physician to rush into the room.
Startled, Eleanor pushed Karsian away, and although Karsian was pushed back, he looked at her with longing, as if he wished the moment had lasted longer.
Regardless, the physician immediately approached Eleanor and examined her condition in great detail. Then, with a wide smile, he concluded that there was no need to worry anymore.
“I was concerned since you were unconscious for three days, but I’m so relieved that you’ve woken up. The inflammation in the wound isn’t severe, and aside from some soreness, you shouldn’t have any more pain. Now, you can focus on replenishing your nutrition and recovering.”
Three days unconscious?
Shocked, Eleanor instinctively opened her mouth.
“Then, the trial date…!”
But she couldn’t finish her sentence. Karsian, who had been silently watching her from his chair, suddenly gave her a look that was cold and unsettling.
Although Eleanor thought she had gotten used to his intimidating expressions, this time, she instinctively shrank back. His intensity was palpable.
Clearing her throat awkwardly, just as she did so, a maid from the Duke’s household entered with Eleanor’s meal. It was a liquid meal, similar to the one Damien was eating.
The physician and the maid, sensing the tension, discreetly excused themselves, leaving Eleanor alone with Karsian. Eleanor awkwardly began eating her meal.
“Wouldn’t it be better if I fed you? You probably can’t manage much strength yet,” Karsian suggested, breaking the silence. Despite the intimidating atmosphere, his voice was gentle.
Eleanor hastily waved her hand, refusing.
“No, it’s fine. I can manage on my own.”
The fact that she had been lying down for three days meant she probably smelled. The maid had cleaned her, but until she could properly wash herself, she didn’t want to get too close to Karsian.
Seeing her resistance, Karsian didn’t insist further. Instead, he quietly returned to his seat, maintaining the silence.
It was strange how everything felt awkward now. The embrace they had shared earlier had felt so tender, yet now there was an unfamiliar distance.
Did he really smell my hair?
Eleanor mentally scolded herself, deciding that there were too many things she wanted to say, but breaking the silence seemed to be the priority.
“I’m sorry I didn’t recognize you sooner, Karsian. I never imagined that the person back then would be you.”
That was the topic she chose: their first meeting.
It had to be this way. Any other topic, especially about her revenge, was too sensitive.
“Back then, I didn’t really see your face, and you seemed so different from now,” she continued.
Wait, is this even a safe topic? Eleanor paused midway, unsure.
Thinking about it, Karsian had been about to ascend to the Duke of Royster at the time. He had grown up like a commoner, but suddenly became the Duke of Royster at just seventeen. So, at the time of Lady Owen’s birthday party, he must have still been in the process of gaining full recognition as a noble.
Considering that, his appearance, so different from the others, and his wariness and hatred of nobles made sense. It was probably a mistake to send him to a party without proper preparation. She could only guess at what Royster had been thinking when they sent him, in such a poor state, to a party like that.
“…Back then, I acted very rudely,” Karsian finally spoke again after a long silence.
“It was the first time I attended a party in the capital. It was also the first time I had been to a noble event,” he added.
His expression seemed to soften, so Eleanor, relieved, listened carefully to his story.
“You might have heard the rumors. Until then, I lived a life far removed from luxury and comfort. My mother passed away when I was very young, so I worked with the hunting squad, helping with monster hunting, and by the time I was about seventeen, I was recognized as the captain. I thought I’d live that way forever, but then something happened. The heirs of Royster all died.”
Eleanor had heard of this tragedy before. The first heir had died in an accident, and the second and third heirs had died of illness. Even the illegitimate children of the former Duke had died from the same illness shortly before.
It was a shocking coincidence, but the nobles spread rumors, accusing Karsian of being responsible. That was when he got the nickname “Royster’s Madman” and “The Prodigal Son.”
“While my father, the previous Duke of Royster, was bedridden, he urgently called me, a son he had all but forgotten, and made me his heir. Without considering my will.”
As Karsian spoke slowly about his past, his face was detached, as if he were recounting someone else’s story.
Eleanor felt sorry for him and clenched her lips.
“After my father’s sudden decision, he worried that my lowly birth would disgrace Royster’s name, so before the coronation, he forced me to come to the capital and mingle with the high-class nobles of Cardiff, to learn how to behave. Looking back, I think it was a hasty and foolish decision. Without proper preparation, being thrown into high society… You must know how that feels,” he said.
Eleanor nodded quietly, agreeing. She knew all too well how ruthless and unforgiving high society could be. It was what made her stronger.
“…Having lived my whole life hunting monsters, suddenly being made the heir of Royster, I found myself disillusioned with my newfound status. I hated the nobles, and I hated being associated with them. At that time, I saw nobles as people who lived comfortably in castles, looking down on those of us who fought monsters every day.”
Although Karsian still felt that way to some extent, he added with a slight smile, “But that day, you were different.”
He looked at Eleanor, who blinked in confusion. “The way you looked at me… Your expression was calm, and your presence was different from the others. It shone brightly even in the sunlight.”
He recalled the first time he saw her at the party, how her face sparkled under the sun.
More than the aristocrats he had seen in the capital, more than the nobles from Royster, Eleanor, emerging from the bushes, had seemed so much more noble and graceful.
“Your skin, so pale and translucent as if you’ve never touched the sun, your hair sparkling, and the grace in your voice and actions… everything about you seemed so unfamiliar and distant to me. You were like someone from another world, someone I could never reach.”
Eleanor blinked, surprised by such an excessive evaluation. It was almost embarrassing for her to hear it, especially from someone like him.
But she didn’t interrupt him, listening quietly as she fiddled with her bowl.
“I was curious, how you, someone so kind to someone like me, could be so different from the others. But… to my embarrassment, that’s when I started to feel angry. I felt foolish for softening just because of one kind gesture.”
Karsian chuckled lightly, recalling his own humiliation. He had despised nobles for so long, but he found himself drawn to Eleanor, a noblewoman, and his feelings became more complex.
“I was ashamed, but I didn’t know why. How could I, someone like me, feel this way? I was embarrassed for thinking it.”
He paused, looking at her with a deep, sincere gaze. “So… I acted rudely, and for that, I apologize. I was wrong.”
“It’s fine. That was a long time ago,” Eleanor said, waving her hand dismissively. She hardly even remembered what had happened, and if anything, she was embarrassed by his apologizing for something she barely remembered.
“…At that time, I thought you’d react like the usual nobles, like they always do. I thought you’d call me rude and leave, or maybe cry like a child, but Eleanor, you just pointed out what I was doing wrong with a calm face,” he said softly.
Karsian looked down, unable to raise his head. “I couldn’t raise my head in front of you because you were right. But at the same time, I felt anger. How could a child who has never suffered lecture me? I thought those things, but time passed, and I heard your story.”
He recalled the time, about a year after he had become Duke, when he attended a party in the capital at the emperor’s suggestion. The young, capable Duke of Royster had attracted all the attention of the Cardiff nobles, but he found it all distasteful.
Despite the flattery, there was one person whose attitude didn’t change.
Eleanor Astria, the only daughter of the Astria family and now engaged to the second prince. She was the one who handed him a handkerchief with no expression on her face that day.
Even after a year, Eleanor still shone with the same brilliance.
Unlike the arrogant and haughty nobles, she had been elegant and unbothered by his change in status.
She had never looked down on him or flattered him, just offering a polite greeting when their eyes met.
He thought about how she never noticed him or the others. Maybe she had been too busy with her future to notice him.
