TYBMB 01

Chapter 1: My Emperor Was Merciful and Cruel
(Originally published: 2024.01.01)

The Emperor I had sworn my wholehearted loyalty to was a remarkably merciful man.

The poisoned wine he gave me to kill me had a deep, luxurious flavor—mercifully so.

Thanks to that, I was granted the privilege of savoring that richness before dying.

But at the same time, he was also a terribly cruel man.

Had he been just a bit less cruel, he might have poured in enough poison to kill me instantly.

But because he didn’t, I was left writhing for nearly three minutes, choking in agony as my esophagus burned.

“Huff, huff…”

As I collapsed and gasped for breath on the banquet hall floor, my emperor, Ernante, calmly looked down at me.

His golden hair gleamed like sunlight, and his fresh green eyes shimmered in my blurring vision.

For a while, we simply looked at each other.

Then suddenly, he knelt beside me and met my eyes.

“I’m sorry. I really intended to let you die painlessly. I never meant for it to be this drawn out or agonizing.”

I wanted to ask why he hadn’t just added more poison—but unfortunately, my tongue was stiff, refusing to move.

This cruel poison was slowly but surely killing my body.

So I couldn’t speak much. I barely managed to push out a single word.

“Why…”

That desperate question, squeezed from the last of my strength, thankfully reached his ears.

He frowned slightly and opened his mouth.

“Why did I poison you?”

When I gave the slightest nod, a faint smile appeared on his lips.

“You really are slow, Yulia. That you still haven’t figured it out…”

As humiliating as it was, I truly couldn’t guess.

Why had my emperor poisoned me?

I had dedicated my life to him as a knight and served him with no lack of ability.

If anything, I had been useful—never treasonous enough to warrant assassination.

Even while dying, I desperately waited for his answer.

And thankfully, he gave it.

“The empire has regained peace. It no longer needs a hero. One sun is enough for the empire—me.”

Ah… so that was it.

Now I understood.

He must have grown displeased with my fame.

Those with supernatural abilities known as “awakened”…

Among them, I was a top-tier awakened. I had defeated countless monsters throughout the Heldenberk Empire with my power.

As a knight, I had eradicated threats and earned great merit.

Because of that, the people revered both me and my commander, Martin, as heroes.

And Ernante… he must have found that insufferable.

That his younger brother Martin and I received more praise than the emperor himself—that must’ve wounded his pride.

I could understand his feelings, at least intellectually.

But still… I had to wonder:

Did he really have to wear that joyful smile at a time like this?

His expression deeply unsettled me.

I had pledged my loyalty to him, and even beyond that—I had loved him. If he had ordered my death, I would’ve gladly given up my life.

I didn’t ask for much.

If only he’d shown even a hint of guilt before killing me, I wouldn’t have resented him.

But Ernante… was smiling.

Smiling as the knight who had loved and served him lay dying.

So, crushed by the despair, I wept.

“Are you crying? Is it that painful?”

He asked, his voice as sweet and vibrant as his smile.

I only replied with ragged, gasping breaths.

He nodded as if he understood, then called to a nearby guard standing dumbfounded.

“Lend me your sword.”

“Yes, Your Majesty.”

The guard handed him a blade.

Mercifully, he poised it vertically over my chest, ready to drive it through.

At last… this excruciating pain would end.

I hoped he would hurry. But my benevolent emperor chose that moment to speak again—pointlessly.

“Any last words?”

I considered begging him to finish it, but gave up.

Instead, I wanted to leave him with at least one line of resentment.

“If… there is a next life…”

Choking on my breath, I barely managed to finish.

“I will never… be your knight… again…”

At those words, Ernante suddenly burst out laughing.

Had my final breath of strength become nothing but a joke to him?

Still chuckling, he replied in a voice full of amusement.

“That’s fine. You don’t need to be my knight in the next life. Why not be my wife instead? Be born as a foolish noble lady—harmless and untalented—and I’ll accept you then.”

What I felt hearing those words wasn’t rage.

It was despair.

To think the man I had served with my entire life was this kind of person…

The mask of nobility he tore off before killing me revealed a grotesque, petty soul.

There was no honor. Nothing of value.

Only childish jealousy festered in his heart.

“Well, I’ll end it now.”

At his words, I closed my eyes.

Finally… peace.

I had never been so ready to embrace death.

But cruelly, my life proved more stubborn than expected.

I heard hurried footsteps from the hallway—then the banquet hall doors slammed open.

“Yulia!”

The man who shouted my name had black hair and a tall frame.

I knew him well.

Martin von Habicht—the miracle of the Heldenberk Empire.

My commander, the head of our knight order, the hero who had fought monsters by my side…

And Ernante’s younger brother, who bore the full weight of his jealousy.

Seeing him, a flood of thoughts hit me.

Why was he here?

Did he somehow learn that I was to be poisoned?

Had he come to save me?

For a brief second, I hoped he had—but I soon shook off the idea.

Martin was far too rational to storm the palace just to save someone like me.

Regardless, his sudden appearance prevented Ernante from delivering the final blow.

“What are you doing here? What happened to the guards outside?!”

Ernante shouted in panic.

Martin threw something at him.

The severed head of the palace guard captain.

It seemed Martin and our knights had cut down the royal guards and fought their way in.

Now they swiftly dealt with the guards inside the banquet hall as well.

Ernante, on his knees and restrained, screamed desperately.

“Let me go! I’m the emperor! Do you think you’ll get away with this?!”

Ignoring the cries, Martin walked to me.

As I gazed at his handsome face—my last comfort before death—he knelt beside me.

As our eyes met more closely, I clutched his trouser leg and begged.

“Please… end this… now…”

I truly wanted to die.

Trapped in agony for minutes, unable to live or die—it was unbearable.

Luckily, my commander was known as a cold-hearted man with ice in his veins. I believed he would grant my wish.

I waited for his sword to strike down and end it.

I believed he would.

But then, unbelievably, warm words of hope spilled from the lips of my icy commander.

“You will not die today. The others are bringing the antidote.”

What…?

I seriously questioned whether I had heard him right.

Martin, my cold and rational superior, was not one to offer empty hope.

Even when a beloved subordinate was injured, if he judged it hopeless, he would end their suffering without hesitation.

But now, faced with my hopeless state, he kept speaking strange words.

“Don’t give up. Just hang on a bit longer. I’ll stay by your side.”

He grasped my cold hand with his own large, warm one.

Through my blurred vision, I barely made out his face—contorted in grief and worry.

The golden eyes that had always been cold now radiated warmth.

Ah… so that’s how it was.

Only then did I realize his true feelings—feelings I had never noticed before.

He rarely showed emotion, so I’d never known. But deep down, it seemed he truly cared for me.

Despite the lingering agony, I felt a sliver of comfort.

Maybe Ernante saw my death as a trivial game—but not Martin.

Martin… might mourn me after I died.

With that thought, a single wish rose in my heart.

I want to live a little longer.

Knowing that he cared for me sparked a faint will to live.

Ten years… No, even five would be enough. I just wanted more time.

But fate can be excruciatingly cruel.

When I wanted to die, my life clung on stubbornly—but now that I wanted to live, it felt like it could snap at any moment.

“Huff—! Cough!”

“Yulia!!”

As I coughed up a mouthful of blood, Martin cried out my name.