Chapter 142
Brief Ecstasy
Even though he was speaking in his usual polite tone, Eleanor noticed immediately that something about Karsian’s atmosphere had completely changed from before.
His red eyes, looking down at her with a blank face, were filled with so much desire that he couldn’t possibly hide it.
Meeting those eyes made her breath catch.
The tension that had barely been held together suddenly swelled, wrapping around her whole body.
With a predator eyeing its prey right in front of her, Eleanor froze completely. She couldn’t answer his question—she couldn’t even blink.
Gulp. Only a dry swallow slid slowly down her throat.
“Dragging you into my arms without mercy.”
Since she stayed silent, Karsian spoke first.
“Kissing those small lips of yours.”
He placed one knee on the bed and slowly reached toward her—not quickly, but with deliberate movement.
The calloused tips of his fingers brushed along her jawline, tracing it gently.
“Leaving marks all over that soft skin—”
Lifting her small chin slowly, he muttered the words like he was biting them out.
“Would that really be fine?”
Eleanor’s long lashes trembled like a startled deer’s for a moment. She still couldn’t speak in front of the desire overflowing openly from his gaze.
It wasn’t like she had never imagined something like this before—but in front of him, she always felt like she became an idiot. Someone who couldn’t say what she wanted, someone who didn’t even know what she truly desired.
Feeling frustrated with herself, she lowered her eyebrows as she looked up at him. And at that moment, the calm expression on Karsian’s face twisted.
Eleanor—so pure and beautiful that she looked untouchable—was staring at him with those clear eyes, and paradoxically, that made her seem unbearably sensual.
Damn it.
Karsian cursed at himself inside. This was practically admitting he had lost to his own desire.
And because of that—
He lowered his head, unable to hold back any longer.
“Mm….”
At the same moment his firm hand cupped her face, her lips were swallowed up by his.
He pushed between her slightly parted lips instantly, sucking gently on the soft flesh and stealing her breath.
A faint scent of fresh wind brushed her nose, and Eleanor closed her eyes, barely managing to respond to his kiss.
Even though she had already experienced this with him several times before, his kiss was always shockingly intoxicating. Every time their bodies touched and hot breaths mixed, her breathing quickened and her whole body heated up.
Perhaps because the pleasure swelling in her chest was so intense, her strength drained within minutes.
Karsian noticed immediately. He grabbed her waist with one large hand and lifted her as easily as picking up a feather.
Before she could even be surprised, her position changed fast. Something hard touched beneath her hips—and in the next moment, she was sitting on his strong thigh, facing him, as if hugging him.
“Um, this position is too….”
Eleanor breathed shakily, pointing out how embarrassing the posture was.
There was no such thing as a modest position while kissing, but this was simply too close. So close she felt like every part of her would be pressed into his hard body, and her face burned red.
“So, do you dislike it?”
Karsian narrowed his eyes lazily. And before she could answer, he kissed her again.
This time she was on top and he was below. But regardless of who was where, Eleanor felt like she was being chased and overwhelmed.
He said I was his first…
He did. He said she was his first love, and his first everything.
But the more she thought about it, the more unbelievable it seemed—he was far too skilled. Every kiss, every brush of his hand felt far too natural, too gifted.
Eleanor, who was competitive by nature, felt oddly annoyed. But there was nothing she could do. She could barely endure the pleasure crashing into her—forget reversing the situation.
The kiss was so intense that a clear string of saliva slid down her lips.
Realizing it, Eleanor flinched. She was an adult, yet she’d drooled during a kiss—mortifying.
She hurried to wipe it, but Karsian moved faster.
A soft lick grazed her lip.
It took her a few seconds to fully understand what had just happened.
“Karsian! That’s dirty…!”
Her pale skin flushed red as she jerked her head away and yelled.
But the one responsible looked perfectly calm.
“You still don’t understand me, it seems.”
His voice, lowered from the long kiss, was even huskier.
He slowly lifted his long lashes and looked up at her. The corners of his mouth curved faintly.
“Why would I ever think anything from you is dirty?”
Anything she gave him—he would gladly take. He added the words before gently nipping her chin.
Eleanor nearly fainted.
To put it frankly… sometimes Karsian really seemed insane.
He was usually more polite and respectful than anyone else, but sometimes he showed a level of obsession that couldn’t be called normal. And it was always directed at her.
Maybe he’s more of a pervert than I thought, Eleanor concluded very reasonably.
As if he could read her thoughts, Karsian didn’t give her any more time to think and wrapped his hand around her thin waist.
She assumed he was going to kiss her again—but his lips went much lower.
“Ah!”
A sharp sensation spread along the line where her neck met her shoulder. Eleanor gasped, and Karsian soothed the spot by licking and softly sucking it.
But below, his movements were far rougher.
Thump!
A weighty pressure pushed up against her body. The unfamiliar stimulation spread through her like a shockwave, and she arched her back without meaning to.
“If you want me to stop… you must say so.”
He whispered like it was a warning, breath brushing her ear.
And then the wave of pleasure hit—wild and relentless.
Karsian devoured her lips mercilessly and stroked her sensitive skin with his large hands as if teasing her. Their clothes stayed on; he just pressed their heated bodies together and moved purely on instinct. Like a beast.
“Ugh… mm…!”
Even her gasps were swallowed by him. She wanted to tell him to stop, but she couldn’t. Every time she managed to pull her lips away, he only moved rougher. Eleanor was swept away like a tiny boat in a storm.
The pleasure was too much. Every time his hard body brushed against her soft skin, sparks went off behind her eyes. Her mind felt blank.
“Eleanor.”
Karsian’s voice—rough enough to scrape his throat—called her name.
Pressed so close, she could feel easily how excited he was. He didn’t even seem able to breathe properly; the hard, heated pressure against her made everything obvious.
“If you don’t say anything… I won’t be able to stop.”
He growled harshly.
It was his final warning. If they went any further, he truly wouldn’t be able to hold back. Even now, he felt like tearing off their clothes and burying himself deep inside her.
Unfortunately, Eleanor didn’t hear him at all. Overwhelmed by the intense stimulation, her mind had gone dizzy and empty. Her body, after peaking, felt weak and limp.
Her head dropped gently onto his broad shoulder as she let out breathless little pants.
“Karsian…”
Her voice came out strained, trembling with pleasure.
Maybe because her earlier fear flashed through his mind then, her tone sounded especially pitiful to him.
He stiffened suddenly and clenched his teeth.
You crazy bastard.
Had he forgotten how pale she looked earlier? How cold the sweat on her skin had been? Had he let lust erase all that?
He couldn’t allow this. She was precious—too precious. Even if he had to stab his own leg to stay in control, he needed to reassure her.
Karsian blamed himself, thinking even an animal wouldn’t be this stupid.
The worst part was that even while he hated himself, deep down he still wanted to touch her more… kiss her more… sink his teeth into her more.
“You should…”
He gripped his thigh hard, speaking with a sigh.
“You should be more cautious of me. At least when it comes to you… I sometimes act like a madman.”
At least he knows, Eleanor thought as she tried to catch her breath. She wanted to reply but didn’t have the strength yet.
“No… this is entirely my fault. I’m sorry, Eleanor.”
Karsian bit his own lips repeatedly as he apologized. There was no excuse—everything was his fault.
“I swear, I won’t touch you anymore tonight. I’ll stay by your side until you fall asleep, so rest without worry.”
His hands were slightly clumsy as he lifted her and placed her back onto the bed. For someone usually so composed, he looked genuinely flustered.
“I’m fine, but…”
After several deep breaths, Eleanor finally came to her senses and glanced at him—more precisely, at his lower stomach.
She was fine. The ecstasy she had felt left her pleasantly tired, and she thought she could easily fall asleep again.
But Karsian?
“…Are you really okay?”
It was obvious he was nowhere near finished. How could he possibly endure like this?
“Yes. I’m fine,”
he said calmly—though he wasn’t.
“Please sleep. You need rest if you want to keep up with tomorrow’s schedule.”
“…Okay.”
It was suspicious, but asking any more questions was too embarrassing. And thanks to the earlier intensity—or the comforting warmth of his hand still holding hers—sleep washed over her quickly.
Eleanor fell asleep almost instantly, still holding his hand tightly.
Karsian tried to leave once she was deeply asleep, but failed. For some reason, she had a firm grip on his hand and wouldn’t let go.
He could pull free easily if he wanted—but he didn’t dare. What if he woke her? He already felt guilty enough for losing control earlier; if he woke her now, he’d want to throw himself off a cliff.
So, he stayed beside her all night, unable to sleep.
Unfortunately, with Eleanor right next to him… and him sitting exactly where their bodies had been pressed together earlier… his damn body kept heating up over and over, cooling down only to burn again.
It was pure torture.
But Karsian accepted it quietly, thinking it was only his punishment for not controlling himself earlier.
